How to Say No Without Sounding Selfish

On this second installment of #AskTheTrivinos, our letter sender Ara asked us how to say “no” and make different decisions without sounding selfish.

1) Be Clear and Direct

When saying no, it's important to be clear and direct in your communication. Avoid ambiguous or wishy-washy responses that might be misinterpreted. State your decision firmly and confidently.

2) Provide a Brief Explanation (If Necessary)

Sometimes, offering a brief explanation can provide context and clarity without sounding defensive or apologetic. For example, if declining a social invitation, you might say, “I already have plans that evening, but thank you for thinking of me.”

3) Offer Alternatives (If Possible)

If you can't fulfill the request as is, consider offering alternatives or compromises that could meet both parties’ needs. This shows willingness to be cooperative despite saying no.

4) Stay Calm and Respectful

Keep your tone calm and respectful throughout the conversation. Avoid becoming defensive or hostile, even if the other person seems disappointed or disagrees with your decision.

5) Stick to Your Decision

Once you’ve communicated your decision, stand firm and avoid wavering. Reiterate your position if necessary, but avoid repeating the same explanations excessively.

Setting healthy boundaries and honoring your own needs is needed to maintain positive relationships and personal well-being. Communication is key to navigating these interactions respectfully and assertively.

From Episode 2 of #AskTheTrivinos Adulting with Joyce Pring: “How to say no without sounding selfish?” #AskTheTrivinos Ep 2”